Who even Am I

You know i hate lies and your absence is making me a liar. Your departure is making me a hypocrite. It would be a lie to say that your absence has freed me from the cage of love. Because it’s getting more suffocating to think on the fact that I have to let go of you though you were never even mine. It makes me a lier to say that your departure has made me happy because i don’t have to sin anymore but in reality I’m thinking of you all the time, ans I’m writing about you all the time. It makes me feel hypocrite when i think of you in my prayer and think of the things you used to say to me. It makes me a liar to say that you have left me and there’s just so much more besides you. It makes me liar to say that I worth much more than having you. How come I worth anyone other than you when you were all the worthiest person I ever wanted to have. You have gone and Here I’m a liar. Lying of being at peace without you. Lying of being myself. It’s all lies.

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repulsion. attraction. repulsion.

You came.

I repelled.

You came again.

I repelled again.

You didn’t stop.

I didn’t let you stop.

You made a home in me for you.

I called.

You didn’t respond.

I called again.

You repelled.

I didn’t let you stop.

But you.

You stopped.

It’s time to talk about matter, some serious matter.

people here in pakistan are way too sentimental and emotional, they cling to whatever emotional they see without realizing is it even trustworth that you’re clinging to?

Yes, I’m talking about religious stuff spreading all over the social medias. We all know how fast this way of spreading anything. There you write something, there you post, there it is spread. So long story short people post emotional things regarding deen calling it Farman e Nabi ﷺ and then there you see how they become Aashiq e rasool on the social medias.

As emotional as they become when you ask them references for what they shared, they not only say we ain’t got no reference but also they say bhae ibadat hai karni ha kro nahi krni na kro, behas na kro. How the hell asking for reference becomes a behas?

This picture posted above is quite viral on facebook i guess atleast on whatsapp i have seen it pretty much. So the thing is I don’t know who has written this up

So where are you going?

Where does the energy and all passion go? I planned so much to do in this month yet all I’m doing is just observing my obligations. I planned of being the most peaceful soul yet I’m feeling chaotic as hell. I planned I’ll gain as much knowledge as can yet all I’m doing is typing this post. I planned of keeping myself happy by keeping my Allah happy yet all I’m doing is being more sad. Where does the energy and all passion go? 1/3 of Ramadan has passed yet I’m feeling no change in myself. Am I a lie to myself? Am I supposed to call myself a hypocrite?

Words

Words are everything. They can break you. They can heal you. They can degrade you. They can uplift you. They can destruct you. They can build you. They can cause you to flow tears. They can cause you to smile. They can sadden you. They can help you. They can squeeze you. They can mould you. They can betray you. They can defend you. They can disturb you. They can calm you. They can ruin your day. They can make your day.

They can do anything, please be good at words.